On the Brink, No Less

… Under all circumstances.  This, I believe, is the missing link.  I believe this is why we hold on to the holiday season in spite of elevating stress levels, diminishing bank accounts, recession, secularism, apathy, and a cynicism that seems to be trying to sneak its way into the American Way.  There is a spirit around these couple of months that transcends all differences and beliefs.  We cling to these times because it is a reminder to pause and be grateful for what we do have, rather than focus on what we don’t.  We remember to cherish the people we have, flaws and all,  because the alternative of being all alone is much worse.  It is one day out of the year where we offer thanks for what we have, for how far we’ve come, and the trials that are now behind us.  

I think Thanksgiving should become the new New Year; to start fresh with the goal of finding something, one thing each day that is worth being grateful for.  We move through seasons, hopefully leaving behind bad and moving toward more good.  That is worth gratitude.  It is in our nature to always want more, strive for more, and this is a good desire.  Yet, we so often focus so far in the future, on what we still want, on what we don’t yet have that we forget to praise what we’ve overcome, what we’ve gained, and all the small victories we’ve had.

The holidays are a magical time for me.  The remind me to be thankful, they remind me to believe in miracles.  They remind me to simply believe;  to believe that life is worth living.  To believe that people are worth loving and trusting.  To believe that we’ve been given a miraculous gift… and every day more and more gifts.  We can wake up Christmas morning and look in the trash, or we can look under the tree.  Each day can be lived just like this- with a choice to look at the garbage or look at the gifts.  

To give thanks under all circumstances.  Every day.  They say it is good for your health, good for your relationships, good for your career.  I’d say it is probably mostly good for your soul, which ultimately dictates all else.

So here is my gratitude list for today, for the present.  Not just a list, but a challenge to add to it every day for the rest of my days:

- A faith that is under constant construction, like the restoring of the Sistine Chapel.  How beautiful though, and so worth the effort.

-My family.  A mom and dad that have unwavering faith in me.  A brother and sister who love me and make me laugh.  A family unit that believes in me and my happiness so much that I am forced to believe in myself.

-My friend-family.  A group of people who have rallied around me through various seasons and pursuits and built walls of protection and joy and grace.  They forgive my weaknesses, tease me to keep me humble, and keep me laughing through all my days.  They surprise me, challenge me to be better than I am.  Plus they know damn-well how to have a good time.

-My work.  A job that is full of focus and passion, and has room for visions that are bigger than I could ever fathom.  A job that is hundreds of miles (metaphorically and physically) away from where I was a year ago.  

-A beautiful home in Chicago.  An apartment that feels like mine, that I’ve created with lovely people, and that brightens my mornings and calms me at night.

- Health that fuels my days.  A thirst for life that is insatiable.  An eternal optimism that fuels my life.

- An education.  My BFA that I so rarely recognize or give appreciation to.  Plus a life education, and a yearning for continual knowledge.

-  Four years in Ann Arbor.  A year in New York.  A new life in Chicago.  I’ve been able to travel and explore and I have so very much life left in me!

- My ‘gift of gab’.  I talk too much, sometimes saying all the right things, sometimes saying all the wrong things.  It is my blessing and my curse, but blessings always trump curses.

- My general obsession with love of all kinds.  I believe in it’s powers, in all the hopes it carries, and the necessity of it in every aspect of our lives.  I may be mocked, but if something is worth believing in it is the love of people, the love they can offer, and all the love that is yet to come into our lives.

So there it is.  A year ago I was living a different life in a different world.  So much has changed and grown.  It makes me so very excited for each coming day and year.  So many reasons to give thanks under all circumstances.

All my love,

Juls